Written by Dani M.
Teen Ambassador 

Everyone has the desire to be loved and wanted by others. We often think the more friends the better, the more people that like us the happier we will be. In middle school I looked for approval in my classmates, rather than the one whose opinion is most important- God. 

Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm (Proverbs 13:20)

Picking the right friends with good morals was a struggle for me in middle school. Instead of looking for friends with Godly attributes I desired to be liked and looked up to by my peers. I craved acceptance from the other girls at the lunch table. Early October one year, I vividly remember sitting at the long table in the cafeteria when I started to hear conversation about Halloween. It was common for each lunch table to do a group costume and attend the same party. When I noticed that most of the girls in the group were being secretive, I immediately felt a pit in my stomach. Shortly after, I had heard from a few of the girls that a separate group chat was created without me in it to discuss the costume. I went up to my room that day after school and cried for hours. I felt unworthy, unwanted and unimportant. I confronted my close friends in the group and asked why they did not want me to be a part of the costume? They confided in me and had told me that the ringleader of the group had not wanted me to be apart and influenced the other girls to exclude me. 

A few days passed and it wasn’t long before my mother asked me what was wrong.  I told her the story and she asked me the question, “What does the Bible say about friendships?” At the time I didn’t think the Bible could solve my friend drama or make me feel any better. Well, was I wrong!  Here’s what I learned.  

Jesus longs for a personal friendship with each one of us.  He wants to be the one we love to spend time with, the one to whom we pour out our heart, the one we high five when we do well on a test! He’s our best friend, wise, patient and the definition of love (John 15:13).  When we get to know Jesus we learn our true value and purpose.  God created us to be in fellowship with Him and this is the example we are to recreate with the friends we choose in life. I learned to be more selective and find friends who had godly wisdom (Proverbs 13:20) to share and were reliable (Proverbs 18:20).  

God gives many examples of powerful and strong friendships in the Bible: David and Jonathan, Naomi and Ruth, Christ and Mankind. It is important to examine your own friend group and ask, is this a clique or a friendship circle? Am I doing anything to make someone feel unwanted? Am I surrounding myself with people who make me feel good for who I am? Good friendships take time to develop but are a gift from God. What kind of friend are you?

By Denene Lucas
What has the power to change the trajectory of someone’s life? What has the power to metamorphosize someone who is broken emotionally beyond repair, to wholeness? What can arrest a person who is living a destructive life full of self- hatred, low self-esteem, rage and addiction, to one whose heart chases after Jesus, whose identity is found in Christ and whose rage has been transformed into a passion to see souls saved?
Every day we awake to hear and read about the atrocities that occur in this world, we hear about husbands killing wives, mothers killing children, we see the acts of hatred perpetrated against individuals and groups of people simply because of the color of their skin, their religious beliefs, gender bias, we see a world full of hurting and severely broken people, lost and devoid of the knowledge of the one thing that possesses the power to change anything it faces. This one thing has the ability to change any situation, any condition, ANYTHING, if that person(s) allows it to enter and reside in her or his heart and by extension their life. What kind of love is this? A love that brings truth into the midst of lies and chaos and calms the storm, it’s the kind of love that takes a person who is at the end, in the gutter, and filthy, raises her up, cleans her from the inside out and gives her a new garment. What kind of love is this? God’s Love.
His Love Saved Me…
One of my favorite songs in Contemporary Gospel is “Your Love Saves Me” by Ashmont Hill. This song speaks of God’s redemptive and transforming love and its power to reach you no matter where you are positionally.
When I accepted Christ at 17 I was broken and shattered by sexual assault, betrayal, and abandonment, I was plagued with thoughts of suicide, I was in a dark place, angry, battle worn, and exhausted from the emotional war that was waging inside of me, I called on the Lord and He heard my cry, and when I made my heart and my wounds accessible, His transformational love took that young woman full of despair and changed me at my core! God’s love is the only love with the ability to change a person, a nation, the world at its very core, when given admittance, how awesome is that?!   
God’s Love
God’s love heals you, which enables you to tell your story from a place of victory and not from a place of victimization and shattered pieces. God’s love is transformational, unfailing, restorative, redemptive, rejuvenating, boundless, unconditional, sacrificial, in relentless pursuit to gain access to your heart, a never-ending source.
1 John 4:10 NIV “This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us.” God’s love is self-generated, spontaneous, it isn’t predicated on our performance, He doesn’t love us because of our faithfulness, His love isn’t temporal, it doesn’t fluctuate based on how we treat Him. God’s love is born from within Him, because He is love.
Max Lucado said “God’s love does not hinge on yours. The abundance of your love does not increase His. The lack of your love does not diminish His and your goodness does not enhance His love, nor does your weakness dilute it.”  
My 16-year-old son would say “That’s LIT!” (hyped or outstanding)
What kind of Love is this?!
John 3:16 tells us, “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.”
This scripture is incredibly significant because it illuminates the potency and potentiality of God’s love. Let’s consider just how different the lives of the lost, the disenfranchised, the agnostic, the atheist, the hate group member, those of us who still haven’t fully embraced, received or trust the love of God would be. This love is so transformative it makes us want to share it, to declare it and offer it to those in need.  This love doesn’t have to get acquainted with you, this love doesn’t have to figure out your likes and dislikes, this love already knows you, it knows your hurts, your aches, your pains, it knows what makes you smile and what makes you cry, it doesn’t look for your value, it already knows your value and it asks nothing more from you but to let it in and take residence. God’s love fills every furrow and every aperture. What kind of love is this? The love of God!

And that's a wrap! Her Life Speaks gathered on June 10th at Montclair Community Church to share a meal with one another, hear a word from Executive Director April Sliwak on this year's small group theme, "Women of the Bible", and share praises and testimonials. Summer is dedicated to the team to rest in the word and in God's presence. Everyone is looking forward to connecting again in September and finding out what the Lord holds this year for Her Life Speaks.